Wednesday, December 28, 2016

The Art of Being Kinder to Yourself…


Over the last year, I’ve thought a lot about the topic of self-compassion. This isn’t to be confused with self-esteem. In many respects if we show ourselves more self-compassion then our self-esteem will automatically increase.

I've also come to realize we get confused by the term self-esteem and the way it's thought of today. For many it's come to mean increasing our sense of self-worth at the expense of somebody else without consciously going out of our way to "steal" from somebody so we get more.  We unconsciously look at like it's a "zero-sum game."

But back to self-compassion...

Many of us have grown up to believe that compassion is a virtue and something to strive to show to others, and I would venture to guess we do. Our natural reaction when we see somebody being victimized or in need of help is to step up and do whatever we can to ease suffering.

However, when it comes to showing ourselves compassion… we struggle. We tend to be hard on ourselves. Maybe feeling there’s so much suffering in the world how dare we “waste” our compassion on ourselves.

But the fact is… this is faulty logic.

Studies have shown when we’re kind and nurturing to ourselves then many of our emotional needs are met, and we are better positioned to focus and help others. It turns out being good to yourself helps you be good to others – what a pleasant paradox!

There are five myths that stop us from showing the self-compassion we deserve. These are thinking:

1. It’s a form of self-pity. 
2. It means weakness.
3. It’ll make me complacent.
4. I’ll be seen as a narcissist.
5. It’s selfish.

I don’t have the space today to tackle each of these myths here but I have written an article that covers the topic of self-compassion in more detail and explodes these dangerous myths, and I hope you take the time to read it and show yourself more self-compassion in 2017.

That is my wish for all reading this post today.

You can find the article: Practicing Self-Compassion – How to Be Kinder to Yourself here >>> 

I wish you a very successful 2017 and you achieve whatever goals you set for yourself.

Best wishes,

Erika Slater CH
Director
Free At Last Hypnosis
Massachusetts